How long do you trust God?

"Gideon replied, "If now I have found favor in your eyes, give me a sign that it is really you talking to me." Judges 6:17
 I started praying about my teaching job last October and I asked God to show me an answer. I prayed day and night all the way until May and then I got my answer. I wish I could sit here today and say that I have fully and completely trusted God, but I haven't. I guess I should say I trust God and know he will take care of me but the minute something comes up that puts my family in a bind my stomach knots up and I'm second guessing what I know I should be doing. I heard my answer loud and clear and that answer was for me to resign as a teacher and stay home. The journey of me staying at home has started off very bumpy. I babysit one baby and others as needed, but here lately that hasn't worked out. When this happens I start to question if I should stay at home or find another job. Then I remind myself that I am doing what God wants me to do and he will provide. This is when I feel like Gideon because I find myself saying, "Ok, God, you want me to stay home but why is it all this keeps happening? Give me a sign that this is still what you want me to do." I laugh thinking about it, because God isn't the one changing his mind, it's me and my lack of trust or more like the lack of wanting to let go of the control I feel like I have when I'm working. You see, without my income as a teacher, I have to fully trust that God will provide for us. He has already proven to me several times that he will provide. "To the faithful you show yourself faithful, to the blameless you show yourself blameless." 2 Samuel 22:26 So, what do I do when I hit a bump in the road? I look to God and say," I am giving it to you and I know you will provide." It is hard for me to do that but I know that he will take care of me and that is all I can do. The rest is out of my control. Does that mean my stomach doesn't knot up, no, it just means that I keep reminding myself that God is faithful and will provide. I do not understand why I've hit so many bumps already but I do know that I can trust my God. "The works of his hands are faithful and just; all his precepts are trustworthy." Psalm 111:7 My God is mightier than any problem I will ever face and I find peace in knowing that all will be okay when I lean on him. "Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see." Hebrews 11:1 God knows what I hope for but more importantly I know his plans for me are far better than anything I could dream. So, how long do you trust God? I will trust him until he calls me home, and apologize for any doubts I may have along the way. Until next time may God Bless you and Keep you.
*Bible verses taken from NIV Bible.