He Loves Us

“I have always loved you,” says the LORD. But you retort, “Really? How have you loved us?” Malachi 1:2 

Do you find yourself trying to grasp the infinite love of God? Can anyone truly comprehend His love for us? I really don’t think we can. We can accept that His love for us is far greater than we could fathom, but to truly understand His love is pretty hard to do. So, I’m sitting here wanting to write something different from what God has laid on my heart. Why? Because I will have to share a part of me that I like to keep tucked away. The part of me that  doesn’t want others to know, because we are all supposed to be HAPPY all the time, especially if we are Christians. Right? At this moment I am happy and so full of joy that my heart feels like it could burst, but I need to be honest. You see, I feel like people believe that since we are Christians we put on a front or we should put on a front. I disagree with this, and feel we should be transparent. Others need to know that you hurt or you have been hurt. Why? In some weird way when you let others know you are hurting or have been hurt you feel better, but something else happens. The hurt you feel doesn’t seem to be as bad because you start to heal. So, I’m going to share with you and prayerfully you will get something from this.
If you look in Malachi the first chapter you will see that God is telling Israel that he has always loved them. “I have always loved you,’ says the Lord. But you retort, ‘Really? How have you loved us?” Malachi 1:2 When did you truly, and I mean deep down in your soul, know that God loves you? I can tell you that I have known that God loves me on a surface level for quite some time. I however, didn’t truly grasp how much on a soul level until here recently. I’m not sure when it happened, but it happened. I grew up knowing that I was loved but never really felt loved. I searched for that love and the love I was looking for couldn’t be found. Not because I wasn’t loved but because the love I desperately needed was the love that only God can give. I can tell you that I love deeper today than I did a year ago. That is because I feel God’s love and I understand how much he truly loves me. If you think of a child who knows they are loved, what do you see? Take a second and close your eyes and picture a happy child. I see bright eyes, a toothy smile from ear to ear and a sense of confidence.  Now think of a child who doesn’t know they are loved. Go ahead, close your eyes again. I’m sure there is at least one child you can picture. I see sad eyes (when you get the chance to look into their eyes), a frown and a sense of I’m not worthy, with their head bowed down. There is a drastic difference in a child who knows and feels they are loved than one who doesn’t know and/or feel they are loved. In the book, “The Five Love Languages of Children” written by Gary Chapman and Ross Campbell they compare a child to a flower. “When the water of love is given, your child will bloom and bless the world with beauty. Without that love, she will become a wilted flower, begging for water.” Campbell, Ross p. 27 I my friends, was the wilted flower begging for water. I finally found the endless supply of water and am no longer the wilted flower. It doesn’t matter that it took until I was grown to comprehend the love I needed could only be given from God. I’m so thankful for His love. “Give thanks to the LORD, for he is good! His faithful love endures forever.” 1 Chronicles 16:34
I can’t tell you how many times I have been told, “I love you,” and all I could think was really? The same is true with God’s love, like the scripture quoted from Malachi; I kept thinking really, God loves me? It is important not only for our children but for others as well; Christians and non-Christians, that we show our love and not just tell of our love. “Little children, we must not love with word or speech, but with truth and action.” 1 John 3:18 I can honestly say it’s not always easy for me to show my love. Mainly because I’m afraid of how it will be taken. I know in my heart, and only because I know how much I am loved by God, that I can show my love and not be afraid.

“If I speak human or angelic languages but do not have love,

I am a sounding gong or a clanging cymbal.  If I have the gift of prophecy

and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith

so that I can move mountains but do not have love, I am nothing.

 And if I donate all my goods to feed the poor, and if I give my body in order to boast  but do not have love, I gain nothing.” 1 Corinthians 13:1-3 

You may disagree with me on this next point, but I feel what 1 Corinthians is saying is until you have God, who is love, then you can’t truly love. You can be the nicest, sweetest, most generous person in this world but without God it means nothing. So today as I wind this up I pray the prayer from Ephesians: “I pray that you, being rooted and firmly established in love, may be able to comprehend with all the saints what is the length and width, height and depth of God’s love, and to know the Messiah’s love that surpasses knowledge, so you may be filled with all the fullness of God.” Ephesians 3:17b-19 I once was broken, but I have been set free because God has always loved me. I am no longer the wilted flower, I am a child of God who knows she is loved and I am capable of loving others deeper than I’ve ever known because God lives in me. Until next time, May Yahweh bless you and protect you.” Numbers 6:24

*Bible verses taken from NLT and HCSB

My will not your will

“Father, if You are willing, take this cup away from Me—nevertheless, not My will, but Yours, be done.” Luke 22:42

Have you ever said a prayer and finished it with not my will but yours? I have. As a matter of fact I prayed that almost every day this week. Have you ever wanted something but you wanted to make sure you were in God’s will? I have. This past week was heart breaking for me, but also an eye opener. If you have a minute, let me share what happened this week.
I had an interview with a school for my dream job. My dream job is coaching and teaching P.E. As with any extracurricular activity the pay is better than a regular teacher; which is only an added bonus to doing what you love.  I started my week off in prayer. I wanted God to give me the right words to say in the interview and to be confident. I continually prayed for His will to be done and not mine. My prayer worked and I had a great interview and was told I would hear back from them by Wednesday or Thursday. So, I continued to pray; God your will not mine. I felt so confident that I was going to get the job that I felt assured my will and His will were the same. There was only one problem. Somewhere between the heartfelt not my will but yours and after the interview; my prayer switched. It was subtle  and I didn’t realize it until last night at my kids meet the teacher. At some point Tuesday and Wednesday and Thursday not my will but yours became not your will but mine. I wanted my dream job, and I wanted it bad. One night while talking to my husband about praying to God about this job I actually said, “not your will but mine.” I honestly didn’t mean it that way but looking back I think my subconscious was telling me what I really wanted. It was in that moment that I realized I wasn’t seeking God’s will anymore I was throwing a fit like a toddler wanting my way. Not only did I want my way but I wanted it now!
It’s Friday afternoon and I didn’t get my dream job. The funny thing is I’m okay with it. I didn’t think I would be, but God reminded me in a very gentle way what is more important right now. Last night at meet the teacher I saw my two very different children approach their new school nervously. As they both spent time in their new classrooms and meeting their new teachers they became relaxed. By the time we left they were excited and ready for school to start. I realized as I was filling out the paperwork (which gives you writer’s cramp) how much I would miss if I took the coaching job. I wouldn’t take them to school or pick them up. I wouldn’t be able to go to parties or field trips. Nope, I would be the working mom who had some time to spend with her kids but we would have plenty of money. As I laid down to fall asleep last night I thanked God for showing me what was important. Coaching is a great way to impact children, but what good am I if I don’t have the time to teach mine the important things in life? How could I be the mom God created me to be with a schedule as unrelenting as one of a coach? My heart broke when I realized I wasn’t getting my dream job, but it broke my heart more to realize how quickly I was willing to give up the impact I have on my kids by being involved in their school activities. I’m so thankful for a God who looks past my wants and my tantrums and gives me what I need. My lesson for the week: who’s will am I really seeking. It’s a contest battle between flesh and spirit. I truly want God’s will and not mine. Letting go of my worldly dreams and what I wanted to become and allowing God to mold me into who He wants me to become is painful. It will be something I struggle with, but I will praise Him for not giving up on me. The most important thing in my life as a parent is to teach my children about God. “Teach a youth about the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.” Proverbs 22:6 Until next time, “May Yahweh bless you and protect you.” Numbers 6:24

*Bible verses taken from HCSB

People Pleaser

“Am I now trying to win the approval of men, or of God? Or am I trying to please men? If I were still trying to please men, I would not be a servant of Christ.” Galatians 1:10

Can you please people and please God? Can you please God and please people? Can you please people and not please God? Can you please God and not please people? Have I confused you yet? I almost confused myself, no really, read each question by itself and then answer it. If you think like I do, you get four yeses. Why all the questions? Who knows, but I like to think and you just read what my mind does pretty regularly…scary…I know. :) On a more serious note, I tend to be a people pleaser. I always have been and though I’m working on it, I probably will always have a tendency to want to please others. I want approval from others and this is where I have to be careful. The only one I should seek approval from is The One and only God. When I realized this, my life started to have less stress in it and I became happier. The verse above from Galatians speaks to me over and over again. “Am I now trying to win the approval of men, or of God? Or am I trying to please men? If I were still trying to please men, I would not be a servant of Christ.” Galatians 1:10 This verse makes it seem like we aren't here to please men, and truthfully we aren't, but that’s another thought. :) In order to know if you are doing something to please men or God you have to look in your heart and sometimes you have to look deep in your heart.
We learn at an early age how to get approval from others. Think about when a baby does something and his/her parents clap and smile. The baby does it again, with same response from the parents. Soon, it becomes a game and so the start of seeking approval begins. I’m not saying this is a bad thing, but you can trace seeking approval back to being a baby. There are two verses that I found to be thought provoking and wanted to share with you. The first verse comes from Romans, “Those controlled by the sinful nature cannot please God.” Romans 8:8 Who has a sinful nature? Everyone is born with a sinful nature, but once you have accepted Jesus Christ as your personal savior the old sinful nature is gone. So, any good work you do before you are saved will not please God. In this instance you would be pleasing men with the good work you do, but you are not pleasing God. Once you are saved can you still please men but not please God? Yes, we can do a great act of kindness but if we do it for the wrong reasons (approval of men) then it is not pleasing to God. We can fool others and even ourselves but God cannot be fooled. He knows our hearts. I used to seek approval of others; I would do something good and want the pat on the back. I’m not saying you shouldn't give credit where credit is due. I am saying that you shouldn't do good deeds just for the approval of others. We should be seeking approval from God and then we will find that others approve of our good works (most of the time).  “When a man’s ways are pleasing to the Lord, he makes even his enemies live at peace with him.” Proverbs 16:7 When we live our lives in such a way that the Lord finds it pleasing, then we are able to be at peace with even our enemies. I bet you can think of one person, who is not very pleasing to be around. I’ll give you a minute…………….. OK, got that person in mind? If we were to be Christ like, which means kind, gentle, and humble to name a few of his characteristics; do you think this person would start acting differently toward/around you? Maybe, maybe not, but one thing is for certain, you would have the approval of God.
In today’s culture it’s very easy to get caught up in what you look like, how much you have, and if you have the newest whatever. We want these things because we want approval of men. We want people to like us, and for most of us we tend to approve of people who like what we like and have what we have. This is the world’s view of people and how the world chooses to approve  people. It’s not easy when you are not approved of because you lack the newest whatever. Instead of focusing on approval of others; focus on approval from God. When you stop and think about people pleasers ( I am one) they want others to like them and ultimately that is the same as approval from others. As I mentioned earlier this is something I am working on. I pray over more things than I ever have before and I find I am less stressed. When we spend time in prayer and read our Bible we learn what pleases God and how we should reflect Christ in our lives.  “For you were once darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Live as children of light (for the fruit of the light consists in all goodness, righteousness, and truth) and find out what pleases the Lord.” Ephesians 5:8-10 When you are walking with God you have His approval and the approval from others will come, but don’t put the approval from others first. As a self-proclaimed people pleaser this doesn't always come easy but knowing that I am in God’s hands and He approves of me softens the blow when others don’t approve of me. Until next time, “May Yahweh bless you and protect you.” Numbers 6:24

* Bible verses taken from NIV and HCSB

Oh, No You Didn't

“Patience is better than power, and controlling one’s temper, than capturing a city.” Proverbs 16:32

This week I have struggled with keeping my emotions and feelings in check. As the week progressed I started looking up scripture that dealt with emotions and feelings. There were several verses that stuck out but one story that we all know from the garden of Gethsemane struck a chord with me. If you read Matthew 26 you will find that it’s a few days before Jesus’ death and takes you through Peter denying Jesus. Peter’s denial isn't what struck me though, nope; it was when Jesus’ companion cut off a man’s ear. “Friend,’ Jesus asked him, ‘why have you come?’ Then they came up, took hold of Jesus, and arrested Him.  At that moment one of those with Jesus reached out his hand and drew his sword. He struck the high priest’s slave and cut off his ear.” Matthew 26:50-51 Obviously, emotions were running high at this point and that was a reaction to prevent Jesus from being arrested. It doesn't say in Matthew who cut off the slave’s ear so I did some digging and found that it was Peter. In the book of John chapter 18 verse 10 tells us that it was Peter who drew the sword and cut his ear off. When I read that earlier this week, my thought was the slave was probably thinking…Oh, NO you didn't! Jesus probably looked down at the ground knowing what was going to happen but not able to control his friend’s emotions, but he did tell him to put the sword away.
Have you ever had a Peter moment? You know, one where you spoke or acted before thinking? I know I have, and sadly once you've said or done something you can’t take it back. When I have days or weeks like this past one where my emotions/feelings seem to be hard to keep in check I turn to the Bible and think of the truths that lie within it. There has been plenty of times that I would get worked up over something because I think this is how somebody feels about me and most of the time it’s just not true. Sometimes, I can spin situations and conversations so many ways that it’s hard to separate the facts from my thoughts. Before I started reading my Bible and trying to walk with Jesus I would react on the situations I had spun in my head. As I've gotten older I have learned to stop, pray, think about what Jesus would say/do and then move on. Thankfully, it has saved me from being a total jerk, but there are still times when I don’t stop and think. Then there are times when I do stop and think but it doesn't take long and I’m back to spinning the what ifs, whys and hows. I struggle with negativity and self-value so it doesn't take much for me to let my mind wander off into the falsehood the devil would like for me to believe. You see, if he can keep your mind occupied on the what ifs and the whys and on yourself he is able to keep you from doing God’s will. You can’t focus on yourself and help others.
Through me reading the Bible and hearing past sermons I know that I can’t trust my emotions or feelings. Jeremiah tells of how deceitful the heart is. “The heart is more deceitful than anything else, and incurable—who can understand it?” Jeremiah 17:9 Kinda ironic isn't it? I mean, we feel so strongly with our heart, but yet it is deceitful. A lot of people say listen to your heart, but Jeremiah says who can understand it (heart). If your heart is deceitful and you can’t understand it, then should we “listen” to it? Don’t trust yourself when it comes to the things that stir up strong emotions. Turn to the Bible instead and see what it says. The more you fill your heart and mind with God’s word the more you will be able to react the way God would want you to and not with raw emotion. Luke says that what is in your heart will come out of your mouth. So, if you have good (God’s word) in your heart these things will come out. Be aware though, if you have evil in your heart evil will come out. “A good man produces good out of the good storeroom of his heart. An evil man produces evil out of the evil storeroom, for his mouth speaks from the overflow of the heart.” Luke 6:45 Inevitably, people are going to say and do things that will upset you. It is up to you on how you react to what they say and do. You can react like Peter and do damage to someone before you've had time to think about it or you can stay calm. “Patience is better than power, and controlling one’s temper, than capturing a city.” Proverbs 16:32 Be patient with others and when your emotions are in full swing keep turning your situation over to God. At some point you have to give it to him and leave it but until your mind stops spinning the situation or you are able to be at peace just keep giving it to God. Always remember true love is shown through action, not words. How we treat people, no matter the situation we are in, is when people can see if God is in us. “Little children, we must not love with word or speech, but with truth and action. This is how we will know we belong to the truth and will convince our conscience in His presence, even if our conscience condemns us, that God is greater than our conscience, and He knows all things.” 1 John 3:18-20 Our feelings and emotions can be hard to control and often times so easy to react on, but today I ask you to stop and before you say or cause someone to say, “Oh, No you didn't”; think how God would want you to react.  Until next time, “May Yahweh bless you and protect you” Numbers 6:24
* Bible verses taken from HCSB

Who is in front of you?

“Then he said to Thomas, ‘Put your finger here; see my hands. Reach out your hand and put it into my side. Stop doubting and believe.” John 20:27
Have you ever felt like you were a day late and a dollar short? How about being blessed with something only to find out it won’t be yours long? That’s how I feel right now. I talked last week of a regret I have. This regret is new and I haven’t been able to let it go. I’m hoping by writing I’ll be able to completely let go and give it to God. So, please bear with me as I write.
Has God ever put someone in your path repeatedly? Did he nudge you to reach out to them? That’s what happened to me. If you will, let me tell you my situation. I have recently become close to a person who God had put in my path several times, but not until now did I listen to His voice. What’s the big deal you ask? Had I listened two years ago or even this past year (when God’s voice was really loud) I would've realized that a friend was right in front me and not just an acquaintance. I would've enjoyed a friendship with someone who lives close by but instead I will have a friendship with someone who’s several hours away. So, what’s the big deal-stop whining. :)
My point is don’t be like Thomas in the bold verse above and doubt what you see or what God wants you to do. I was afraid to reach out to someone, to get to know them because I was afraid of rejection. I was afraid of what this person thought of me. We are not called to be timid or afraid of others. “For God has not given us a spirit of timidity, but of power and love and discipline.” 2 Timothy 1:7 Being filled with the Holy Spirit we should be courageous and bold in all that we do, especially if it’s God’s will. God has a way of putting people in your path for you to reach out to even if you don’t realize it or are flat out ignoring Him. I can honestly say my experience was both. At first I didn't think anything of our paths crossing but then I clearly heard His voice and ignored it. I was stuck in fear and playing out situations that were false. That’s the devils way of getting you to not do God’s will.
So, I make this plea……don’t wait until it’s too late to receive the blessing God is trying to give you now. When you hear his voice, listen and obey. Be brave like Peter and step out on the water with Jesus. “Peter said to Him, ‘Lord, if it is You, command me to come to You on the water.’  And He said, ‘Come!’ And Peter got out of the boat, and walked on the water and came toward Jesus.” Matthew 14:28-29 We know Peter became frightened and started to sink, but the point is Peter got out of the boat! When Peter was brave he experienced a miracle…he walked on water! God is waiting for you to open his gift, to experience a miracle. He wants to bless you. Will you listen to His voice and truly see who is in front of you? Take time to see if there is a reason why your paths keep crossing. Be courageous and do what He tells you, even when you are full of fear and doubt. Like Peter, God will reach out his hand and give you the grace you need-just call on His name. “But seeing the wind, he became frightened, and beginning to sink, he cried out, ‘Lord, save me!’ Immediately Jesus stretched out His hand and took hold of him, and said to him, ‘You of little faith, why did you doubt?” Matthew 14:30-31 Don’t be so caught up in your own world you pass up all the blessings God has for you. Until next time may God Bless you and Keep you.

*Bible verses taken from NIV and NASB

Enjoy this song by Matthew West: My Own Little World