God Knows

"Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence? If I go up to the heavens, you are there; if I make my bed in the depths, you are there. If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea,even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast. If I say, "Surely the darkness will hide me and the light become night around me," even the darkness will not be dark to you; the night will shine like the day, for darkness is as light to you. For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb." Psalm 139:7-13

Have you ever thought, why does this have to happen to me? I'm sure you have and I bet you have even dealt with disappointment. I have been dealt a great bit of disappointment in my life and the latest was just a couple of weeks ago. Before I dive into that disappointment let me set it up with an event that happened 10 months ago. February was suppose to be a neat month for me, because I was going to attend our church's revival. It would be my first revival but I was also going to help in the kitchen, since I was now on the kitchen committee. My husband and I were looking forward to it, but that didn't happen.
    My step dad was sick with cancer and the week before the revival was to start he was put in the hospital then sent home with hospice. My husband and I, with our kids went down to visit my step dad for what we were told could possibly be the last time. Our visit was good, but sad. The man lying in the hospital bed didn't even resemble the man I knew to be my step dad. We left Sunday morning to get the kids back and ready for school, but more importantly because our church's revival started that night.  I couldn't wait to get back and go but was almost certain my step dad was going to die soon. I didn't want to leave my mom and cried myself to sleep on our two hour drive home. We made it home just in time to straighten the house up and head up to the church. In the middle of the sermon that night my phone buzzed in my pocket. It was my cousin so I ignored it and listened to the pastor who was giving the sermon on the mount from memory. My phone buzzed again and this time something told me to answer the phone. I walked quickly out of the sanctuary and answered the phone. My cousin, crying said, "Kim, your mom told me to call. DA just passed away."  I hung up the phone and stepped outside, my husband was by my side in just a few minutes. After the service was over we made plans for our kids to stay with family and we left the next morning.  The week was long, but I spent a lot of quality time with my mom. When we returned home the following Friday I was excited to be home, but sad to leave my mom. I stopped by to thank our pastor for driving the two hours to attend the funeral. I told him I was disappointed we missed the revival. His reply has stuck with me and I think it always will. He said, "Kim, no need to worry about that. God knew you weren't going to be at this revival. You were where you were suppose to be."
    Those exact words came to my mind two weeks ago when my mom handed me a fist full of disappointment. She was suppose to attend our church's Christmas program. I was very excited because the music that the adult choir was singing touched my heart. My whole family had some part in the program and I couldn't wait for her to hear it. I prayed that the music would touch her heart like it touched mine. My heart broke the afternoon of the program when I was told that she couldn't make it. My prayer for her to be touched by the  music wouldn't be answered. The Christmas program was beautiful, just like I knew it would be. It was a moving night and the house was full. I went home and prayed for my heart to forgive and heal...quickly because I would see her the next day. I went to work the next morning and as I was praying for my heart to not be cold towards her,  my pastor's words came back to me. God answered my prayer and reminded me that He knew she wouldn't be there. I remembered then that God was in control and although disappointment hurts God knows long before I do what is going to happen. That afternoon when she arrived to go to my son's Christmas program  at school I was excited to see her. My heart had truly forgiven her, and I was able to enjoy her company. As the year comes to an end and you stumble across those days of disappointment the year has brought you, remember God knows what is going to happen. He knew before you did and the truth is I wouldn't want it any other way. You can't escape His presence and although we can't see what our future holds, He knows...He's been there. "The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged." Deuteronomy 31:8  Until next time may God Bless you and Keep you.
*Bible verses from NIV Bible

A Mother's Love

The birth of any child is a blessing and a miracle from God to say the least. The moment you realize you are pregnant your life changes and you find yourself wondering what this new life will be like. You can't grasp the drastic change a child brings to your life. I know that I have been blessed beyond my wildest imagination with my two children. This time of year we all focus on the babe in the manger but as a mom I can't help but wonder how Mary felt. From the day Gabriel came from Heaven to tell her you will have a son and you will call him Jesus to the day he was crucified. "You will conceive and give birth to a son, and you are to call him Jesus." Luke 1:31 When the pregnancy test says you are pregnant you are hopeful but when you go to see the doctor and they confirm you are pregnant you rejoice. From that moment on you do everything in your power to protect, love and nurture your baby. You are filled with joy and hope for a future that is still unknown.  Mary must have felt the same way, except her baby is the reason we rejoice and have joy and hope. Her son brought joy and hope into this world when he was born on that night in Bethlehem. As all mother's do, she took care of him and wrapped him in strips of cloth and laid him in a manger. "This will be a sign to you: You will find a baby wrapped in cloths lying in a manger." Luke 2:12 Do you think at that moment she realized that her baby would be our savior, that this sweet infant would be the ONE who comes and brings everlasting life to those who believe? Did she know that she would again be wrapping him in strips of cloth 33 years later when his job on this earth was done? "Joseph took the body, wrapped it in a clean cloth." Luke 27:59 My heart breaks for Mary as she knows her son is born to die. The birth of a child is a day a mother will never forget, but parents are suppose to die before their children. This is not the case for Mary and in that way we can in one way or another relate to her, the mother of the chosen one. It's easy to forget that Jesus was a baby, and the bonding that took place between him and Mary as he grew into a toddler, a boy, a teenager, and a man. Jesus was human, meaning he like all of us, had to learn to talk, walk and was dependant upon Mary to take care of him. As a mother of two, I would take a bullet, jump in front of a car or( in those days) hang on a cross for my children. I can't fathom how Mary felt watching her baby boy suffer a terrible death on the cross so He could save the world. The heart ache must have been unbearable but knowing that she would see her son in Heaven one day must have soothed her aching heart. The bond between mother and child is strong but the bond between a mother and God incarnate....wow! This year as you spend time with your children remember the babe born in a manger who gives us all joy and hope and a reason to live. Those emotions we felt when our babies were born were magnified that night...REJOICE! Our savior was born and died but still lives...Merry Christmas!! Until next time may God bless you and keep you.
*Bible verses used from NIV

The gift that keeps on giving

"For to us a child is born, to us a son is given,  and the government will be on his shoulders. And he will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace." Isaiah 9:6

My family and I have started decorating for Christmas but it's taking longer than what I would like. We have something going on almost every night of the week and sometimes more than one thing for the night. I know it's all part of being a mom of two little kids and being married to a band director, but I like to slow down and enjoy the decorating not just throw it up so we can say we did it. As I sat on the living room floor going through our decorations I began thinking of how silly we can be this time of year. The whole reason we celebrate Christmas is to recognize the birth of our savior but, we get so caught up in the shopping and the decorations it tends to take away from the birth of Jesus Christ. I got up from my spot on the floor and posted the following on facebook: "Sometimes I don't like this time of year because people are so consumed with what they want. It is better to give than to receive but honestly we can't out give what's already been given to us through the birth of Jesus, his life on earth, and his death when he conquered the grave. Share the good news this Christmas....you might introduce someone to a gift that lasts for an eternity." I, like everyone else, tend to get caught up in the giving of gifts and the decorations. This year I have a burden to give more than I have in years past. I have already given but will continue to give. I can give with money but more importantly I can give my time. I want to start a family tradition and that is to give as much as we can all the time not just during Christmas. The truth is God gave us his son so we could have everlasting life with him in heaven and there is no greater gift than that. I can't out give my God and savior but I can give money and time to those who need it and I can share the story of my savior Jesus Christ. Although I can't give the gift that keeps on giving I can introduce people to the one gift that will not only change your life today but for eternity. I plan on focusing more on the babe in the manger than all the hustle and bustle. As you go about your days planning please set time aside to visit with your friends and family and let them know how much they mean to you. Don't wait for the holidays to pass so you're not so busy, the truth is we are busy all the time. Give however you can give to those in need, either by donating money or time and watch the Christmas spirit come alive. Rejoice that you have the gift that keeps on giving and introduce others to that gift. Praise be to God in the highest! Until next time may God bless you and keep you.
*Bible verse taken from NIV Bible