Love Others

 “If I say to the wicked, ‘You are going to die’, and you don’t sound the alarm warning them that it’s a matter of life or death, they will die and it will be your fault. I’ll hold you responsible.” Ezekiel 3:18 The Message

There is a famous quote by Edmond Burke that has been on my mind lately and it states, “The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.” How long will we Christians sit on our hands and hide in our “perfect” worlds of blue skies, rainbows, and churches filled with fellow believers who pretend to have it all together? Our beliefs are being mocked and disregarded as we sit complacently in our chairs, pews, and homes accepting that this is just how it all goes down. The more we sit back and do nothing, the worse this world will get, and more souls will be lost, rightfully so. We are in the midst of a battle, and instead of drawing our swords to fight we are sitting back and allowing the enemy to win. 

The youth of today are being bombarded with a worldview that sets them up for mental illnesses, poor health, and a mindset that focuses only on themselves. Empathy and sympathy are headed out the window, while pride and selfishness are marching through the door as a way of living the best life. I’ll get what I want, and it doesn’t matter who I hurt or how I get it;  just as long as it doesn’t hurt me. This way of thinking is becoming more and more prevalent. Our kids have access to news, social media, and information that they’re not old enough to understand. Their brains are not fully developed, and yet we seem to think it will not affect how they behave or perceive the world and themselves. Their identities are being built on how many followers, likes, and viewers they have on their social media accounts. As Isaiah says, “What sorrow for those who are wise in their own eyes and think themselves so clever.” Now is the time to take a stand, speak the truth, and let them see that there is a better way and that their identities are found in Christ. 

How can we change this? How can we fight when it seems we have already lost the battle? We must put on our armor, take up our swords, and remember we are fighting a battle, but the war has already been won. God will be with us and has gone before us. Stand firm, be bold, and LOVE others so the world can see there is hope in this dark, lost world. We need to LOVE others how Jesus loves us. That means speaking the truth, and the only truth worth speaking is the words from the Bible. We are at a point in history where if we don’t start speaking the truth we are missing our purpose. People are hurting, suffering, and looking for hope, justice, love, and peace. The harvest is plenty, and now is the time to start reaping. As Christians, we can point them to the only one who can give them what they are looking for, but we can’t do this by pretending that our lives are perfect. It’s time to be real with others. It’s time to start living life the way God intended it to be lived, and that means allowing others in our lives. We need to get off our cell phones and social media, out of our houses, and look up to see what is really going on around us. We can hide in our houses and give our money to the poor, but until we get outside and LOVE others we aren’t really living the life God has planned for us. “If I gave everything I have to the poor and even sacrificed my body, I could boast about it; but if I didn’t love others, I would have gained nothing.” 1 Corinthians 13:3 (NLT) Challenge yourself this week and choose to go for a walk and talk to a neighbor, set your phone down on your lunch break and visit with a coworker or family member, or send an encouraging text to someone you care about. Be the light and LOVE others.

Turn on the light

 "Then Jesus spoke to them again: "I am the light of the world. Anyone who follows Me will never walk in darkness but will have the light of life." John 8:12

    Ouch! I grumbled as I walked into the doorframe half asleep. I didn't want to turn the light on as to not disturb my husband as he lay in bed asleep, but my eyes didn't adjust to the darkness quick enough and I stumbled into the doorframe as I left our bedroom for an early morning trip to the bathroom. I wasn't seriously injured, but I could have been.

    Have your eyes adjusted to the darkness of this world? Do you prefer to walk in the darkness so you can't see what is around you? Many people will say that it's good to accept the world's view on every subject, but I disagree. We should stand firm on our Christian beliefs and morals. As Christians, we know that God banished Satan to earth and gave him free reign on this world until Jesus comes back again. As the time for Jesus to return draws near, Satan has and will continue to corrupt this world and that is why we can't accept the world's view. The corruption can be seen throughout the world and it is becoming more evident every day, even here in the "Bible belt", where I live. We are slowly accepting evil and often times we do not realize that it is happening. This has not happened overnight; we can look at our acceptance of moral decline as something so small as the acceptance of foul language in TV shows and movies. When you walk in the grocery store or go out to eat with your family you will most likely hear the expletives flying all around you, and no one seems to even notice. We have become desensitized to foul language because of what we allow ourselves to listen to and watch daily.  Sadly, our eyes have adjusted to the darkness of sin just enough that no one can tell that we are walking in the dark, which is exactly what Satan wants. He wants your eyes to adjust to the darkness just enough so that you can see but you don't realize what is really going on. Satan disguises himself as an angel of light and tricks people into thinking that there is nothing wrong with the dullness of the light he is shining. His light illuminates just enough for you to keep walking safely or so it seems to be safe. He is causing many Christians to stumble because he's shouting don't turn the light on and we're listening. What light?

    In John chapter eight, Jesus called himself the light of the world. When you became a Christian you were filled with the Holy Spirit and thus have the light living in you. Satan doesn't want you to turn your light on because you will make the world bright. The dull light that he is shining for you will dissipate and the true light will shine brightly and illuminate the things that are important for the Kingdom of God. The darkness will fade as you share the gospel and become the hands and feet of Christ. The darkness will fade as you love others as yourself. The darkness will fade as you speak Jesus' name over your life, a tough situation you may be facing, a bad relationship, or many other hurts that life has to offer. Turn your light on, so you can truly see this world as God sees it, and as Jesus saw it while he was here on this earth. Pick up your Bible and read it, then apply it to your life, pray throughout your day, sing God's praise, and thank him for your many blessings, so your light will not be dimmed. Turn your light on and keep it shining for others to see.

    When you turn your light on Satan scampers away because he can not co-exist with Jesus. Jesus wins every time. Satan cries out OUCH when we turn the light on, just as I did when I walked into the doorframe. I made it back to my bed without running into the doorframe on my way back from the bathroom because I allowed my eyes to adjust to the darkness before attempting to walk back to my bedroom. I didn't turn the light on so I wouldn't wake my husband up, but as Christians, we should turn the light on, and wake up the people around us, so they can truly see and not stumble in the darkness. 

"In the same way, let your light shine before men, so that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father in heaven." Matthew 5:16

Too Simple

    

"But his officers tried to reason with him and said, "Sir, if the prophet had told you to do something difficult, wouldn't you have done it? 2 Kings 5:13a NLT

How many times have you missed out on being healed because you didn't like the way it looked or sounded? As little kids, a kiss on the boo-boo or a band-aid is an immediate fix. We are happy with the attention and run off to play some more. As we get older that simple fix doesn't work and we want ice, a band-aid, and some time to rest and recover before we go back to playing. Once we become adults a simple fix just doesn't seem to solve the hurt, you have to baby the wound before you can move on. The simple things just don't work or at least that is what we are programmed to believe. This not only happens physically but spiritually; before we know it, a period of time has flown by, and we are still trying to heal. This healing can be from someone or something in your life that has hurt you, but for this post, I'm going to speak on our sins. Yes, even I sin, it's inevitable, and though I don't like to admit it I sin daily. We are told as believers if we ask for forgiveness of our sins they will be forgiven. "If we confess our sins, He is faithful and righteous to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness." 1 John 1:9 HCSB 

    How many times have you missed out on a blessing, blessing others, or a calling because you could not forgive yourself? The Bible, which is God's word, clearly states that if we ask for forgiveness it is given, so why do we have such a hard time forgiving ourselves. We get caught up in our mistakes and we are not able to move forward. I have a theory, or at least God is opening my eyes to why I struggle with forgiving myself. IT'S TOO EASY! Like Naaman from 2 Kings, I find myself thinking in order for me to gain forgiveness from God it should be earned. I should have to do some difficult task to be worthy of God's forgiveness and to forgive myself for messing up, but that is not what God says to do. Let's look at Naaman's background real quick and discuss this story that jumped out at me one morning this past week as I read my Bible. Naaman was a commander of the army of the king of Aram. He was an excellent commander, won many battles, and was favored by the king, but there was a problem, Naaman had leprosy. During this time, leprosy was viewed as a sign of sinfulness and you needed to ask for forgiveness and be cleansed. Naaman went to Elisha's house, a prophet of God so he could be cleansed of this "sin". His response to his cure isn't too far from what mine has been at times. He became angry and refused to do what Elisha's messenger told him to do. Why did he become angry? Naaman was expecting Elisha to come out and wave his hand over him or at least give him some difficult task to complete. Instead, Elisha sends a messenger to tell Naaman the simplest of tasks, "Go and wash yourself seven times in the Jordan River. Then your skin will be restored and you will be healed of your leprosy." 2 Kings 5: 10 That's it, just go wash yourself, it seems simple enough.

    You see Naaman was expecting a different answer, and this threw him off guard. In my opinion, Naaman did the hard part which is humbling himself and asking how to be cleansed. He was not expecting it to be so simple. Him being a commander expected the cleansing to be a more tedious task, and was upset that he traveled when he could've just washed in the rivers of his country. It took his servants asking him if it would have been a difficult task if he would do it just to be cleansed for him to realize his reaction was a bit dramatic. Of course, Naaman was like, well yeah I would do the difficult task, and his servants asked him then why won't you do this simple thing? Just go wash yourself in the Jordan, it's so simple and we can be on our way, serving our king and winning battles. (emphasis is mine) We are not told the time frame from when Naaman showed up at Elisha's house to when he decided to go wash in Jordan. Can you picture the shock on his servants' faces when he was given this simple assignment and refused to do it? 

    Let's bring this back to us when we ask for forgiveness of our sins. Can you picture God's face when we don't simply come to him and ask for forgiveness? He already knows what we've done and why we've done it. We want to ask for forgiveness and hold on to it like it's a treasure or not even bring it to him. Either way, when you don't bring it to God and leave it with him you are weighing yourself down. He can't do the work in your life and you will struggle to do what He has called you to do because you won't allow the simple act of asking for forgiveness to set you free. The hardest part is humbling yourself before God, admitting that you messed up, letting it go, and moving forward. Yes, it's really that simple. We are not supposed to walk around feeling shame and guilt for weeks, months, or even years. I'm not saying we shouldn't feel those things when we mess up, because we should, but once we have asked for forgiveness we have to let it go and move on, not sit in the guilt and shame. The devil is at work when you get stuck in these feelings and, honestly, he is happy that you are there and will do whatever it takes to keep you there. Don't allow yourself to get stuck because you can't forgive yourself for what you've done. Will there be consequences? Yes. Will it be easy to let go? Maybe, but maybe not. Will you have to work daily to move forward? Most likely yes, but that's for anything you do. Don't be so hard on yourself, give it to God, and move on with life. Seek forgiveness and set things right with those you have hurt and move forward. You are loved and worthy of living a life full of blessings from your loving father. Don't be a Naaman and torture yourself for your mistakes and make your life, and the life of those around you miserable, simply go before your loving Father and ask for forgiveness. I know it's a lot easier said than done, but as soon as you accept it you will be set free. 

God hears you

 "Ask, and it will be given to you. Seek, and you will find. Knock, and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, and the one who seeks finds, and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened." Matthew 7:7-8 CSB

    This past month God has opened my eyes to all the prayers that I prayed years ago and he has answered or is answering. I am thankful every morning that I wake up because I have another day to spend with my family and hopefully show others that God loves them. Still, this revelation that God has given me this month has opened my eyes to how he works and I am thankful for God's answered prayers in a new way. What I'm about to share is not me bragging about what I have or what I have done, but to show you how God works, at least in my life, and to give Him the glory he deserves. 

    Ten years ago, Nick and I celebrated 9 years of marriage, and we had a 7 and 5-year-old. We lived in a double-wide a few blocks away from where we live now. We both were sitting outside reading books on prayer and learning how to walk closer to God. We read a book by Mark Batterson titled, Circle Maker. This book initiated a conversation between us that I truly believe has led us to where we call home today. I was still in what I would call my infant phase of belief and what God is capable of doing, very innocent and naïve to how prayer works and how quickly he would answer our prayers. Mr. Batterson, wrote about walking around a property that he felt the church should purchase, but knew there was no way the church could afford it. His faith in God's ability to not only allow the church to relocate to this new property, but also afford it opened my eyes to what God was not only capable of doing, but what He was willing to do if we would only ask Him. You see, many times God wants to bless us with so much more, but we put limits on what we think He is willing to do for us, and therefore we don't ask Him. As Nick and I finished our books, we did what the author did and we walked around our house seven times for seven days and prayed that God would allow us to sell the house. We wanted out of the double-wide and into a brick home, where that home would be we weren't sure, but we didn't want to live in the trailer any longer. I'm sure our neighbors thought we were crazy, but I'm sitting here to tell you the prayer worked. It didn't happen after the seven days of walking around the house, or within the month, or even the year. As a matter of fact, so much time passed that I nearly forgot about the summer we walked around our house praying for God to provide us a house that we would be proud of, that would allow us to bless others, and invite people over for fellowship. A house that we could call home and our kids would have friends over and there would be plenty of room for everyone. As the years went by I just assumed that we weren't going to move out of the house and focused on being happy with what God had blessed us with, which was a small home that allowed me to be close to my kids, protection from the weather and many other provisions that we tend to take for granted in America. The walk around our house, some days with kids following us, and other days just the two of us was a simple way to show our faith in God. Three years ago that prayer was answered. God heard our prayers and gave us a beautiful century-year-old home on about two acres in the middle of our little town. We had no clue at the time what we wanted or where it would be, but we did know that we wanted it to be from God and allow us to bless others. God blessed us abundantly with this new home. It wasn't in the time frame we wanted, and yes, there were times I didn't understand why He didn't answer our prayers immediately, but looking back I can see His hands at work in our lives. There is another story about us buying this home, but that is for another time. 

    If you will sit with me for a little longer, I would like to share one more account of God hearing and answering our prayers. As I was finishing my teaching certification, I desperately wanted to work for Whitehouse ISD, but being straight out of college, and not growing up in this area the odds were stacked against me. I was fortunate enough to complete my student teaching at two schools in Whitehouse and was praying that a position would open up for me to work in this district. As my time as a student teacher came to an end and I interviewed for a position it became clear that I would not be hired by them, and would need to apply elsewhere. God opened doors for me as only he can and I was hired at Gladewater. As the years passed when there was an opening at Whitehouse I would apply and was interviewed but I always came up short. Over time, with each rejection, I believed that I was never going to be hired to work in Whitehouse, so I stopped applying for the positions posted and I accepted that I was where God meant for me to be. I allowed myself to believe that I just wasn't good enough and would never be the caliber of teacher Whitehouse hired, and accepted the lies the devil told me. Then out of the blue, a position opened up last year in Whitehouse and Nick told me I should apply. At first, I laughed at him, one because I wasn't looking for a job, I was content with my current position, and two, I believed that I wasn't good enough to work for Whitehouse. The repeated rejection over the years from the school was enough to keep me from even being interested enough in applying for the job, but after prayer and encouragement from Nick, I decided to see if this was God opening a door for me. As I sat in the interview I knew no matter the outcome I was good enough to work at Whitehouse. God was definitely at work in this situation and became evident when I knew I had the job within 5 minutes of the interview being over!  Most of the time after an interview you have to wait a day up to a week to know if the school was going to offer you the job. After 11 years of teaching, and the uncertainty of if I should even be a teacher, God opened the door for me to work at Whitehouse. Another prayer that was prayed years ago was answered.

    This summer I have been reminded of those prayers and many more that I prayed 7 or more years ago that God has recently answered. It is now, that he has opened my eyes, that I can see he heard my prayers but didn't answer them with an immediate yes because I wasn't ready. I needed to have the experiences that those years of waiting and not getting what I prayed for brought me. You see, God hears our prayers: I asked and received. I sought and was given what I prayed for. I knocked and the door was opened. True, none of this happened on my timeline, or how I wanted it to happen, but God made a way and blessed me in the process. I am better because of the waiting and more thankful for what He has blessed me with because it did not happen the way I wanted it to. God's ways are so much better than ours. Trust in his timing and accept that where you are, no matter what you are going through is where he wants you. 

Take Him out of the box

 "Go to my servant David and say, "This is what the Lord says: Are you to build me a house to dwell in?" 2 Samuel 7:4

    As I was reading my Bible in a year from the Bible version app this morning this verse jumped off the page at me. I continued to read and I felt like God was asking me why I was keeping him in a box. As humans, we tend to put God in a box because we can only comprehend so much of His abilities and powers, so it makes sense for us to put our attributes, mostly our strengths, on God. If we can do this, then that means God can do it too. The obvious problem is God can do so much more! I laughed at myself as I thought about this verse and it dawned on me that even David, a man after God's own heart, wanted to put God in a box. 

    Do you know what God tells David? He says, "I have been with you wherever you have gone, and I have destroyed all your enemies before you." I will make a great name for you like that of the greatest on the earth." (vs 9) I don't want to misconstrue what God is saying here or take it out of context but when I think on this it reminds me that God isn't just in a building that we call a church. He is with me! He is with me at my house, at my job, on the road, in the store, and at church. He isn't a member of the church who greets me at the door or the Pastor who preaches every Sunday that I won't see again until next week. No, God enters the church with me and leaves the church with me. He doesn't dwell in the church. At least not the church building.

    God is with me wherever I go, because I am the church. He lives in me! As a Christian, once I accepted Jesus as my savior I received the Holy Spirit thus allowing God to dwell in me. There is power in realizing this, and there is something to be said about a person who accepts and lives this out. The problem is we often forget the power we have access to because we see our faults and weaknesses and focus on those attributes instead of the power that we have. So, what can we do to change this?

    PRAY! Stop putting God in a box. Stop leaving God at church. Stop walking around in defeat. Stop focusing on your weaknesses. Stop putting yourself down. Stop comparing yourself to others. Stop putting God in a box. PRAY for God to show you His power. PRAY for God to remind of you that He is with you. PRAY for God to help you realize when you have negative thoughts so you can stop them in their tracks. PRAY that God will remind you that He has already won and He is victorious, which in turn means you are victorious too. PRAY that God will show you when you are limiting Him in your life. Ask God for what you need. Speak Jesus' name over every situation you're in and watch Him work in your life.

    Our Western Christian culture has made it easy for us to put God in a box. We have dummied down our faith and put restrictions on people who want to be God's hands and feet. We have allowed this country to be taken over because we have sat silently believing that this is how Jesus would respond. If we want to make a difference in this world and see a change it has to start with us, with me. I have to stop putting God in a box. I have to stop being afraid of what might happen if I allow God full access to my life. I have to accept that I am not in control and God really does know what is best. I have to remember that Jesus would not sit by and watch as others sinned and allowed corruption to reign. 

    God doesn't belong in a box. God doesn't want to be left in the church building. God wants to go with you wherever you go. God wants to use you. He created you for a time such as this. There is a reason you are alive today. There is a reason that you have certain talents and gifts. The question is are you ready and willing to put those talents and gifts to work for God. God LOVES you! Go ahead, take Him out of the box. Go for a walk or a drive and talk to Him. He's ready, are you? 

    

Today

 

    You are an Author!  You are Beautiful!  You are Called!  You are Chosen!  You are Enough!      You are Equipped!  You are Loved!  You are Unique!

    I have those words on a sticky note or index card taped to my desk. Something so silly, but yet a daily reminder of who God says I am. I need those daily reminders as I'm sure most of you do, and if you're like me you want others to say those affirmations to you, but it doesn't happen. The older I get the more I realize how much I rely on others to lift me up when the only one I should rely on is God. God is the one who created me and knows my inner most thoughts and intricate designs, and only He can truly lift me up and it have a lasting effect. God is good like that. He speaks the truth and only the truth, so if God says it then it must be true. The only problem is I have to believe what He says about me, but the reality is once you've been knocked down it's not always easy to believe the truth. 

    The TRUTH....

    Today, Good Friday, we look to the cross and remember the sacrifice of Jesus Christ and we, as Christians, say, "It's Friday, but Sunday's coming," and we become overjoyed with what Sunday means, but come Monday we're back in our routine and the joy of Jesus' victory over death has left our minds. We don't "cling to the Old Rugged Cross" or "walk in the garden" or even "run out of the grave"; no we drag ourselves out of bed, grumble that it's Monday, stumble through our morning routine, just to wish it was Friday all over again, so we can enjoy our weekend. Jesus didn't come to this earth, live a sinless life, and die for us to stumble through the week praying for the weekend. He came so that we can LIVE! He came to conquer SIN! He came to defeat DEATH! He CAME and CONQUERED and DEFEATED the devil! He is VICTORIOUS! Jesus made a way for us to LIVE and not just to live but to LIVE VICTORIOUSLY! 

    Today, as you look to the cross and the sacrifice of Jesus Christ take some time to reflect on your life, be willing to look deep into your life, look at yourself, look at your routine, look at your thoughts, look at your actions and ask yourself, "am I living or am I LIVING?" Are you stumbling through the week? Are you living day to day? The more honest you can be with yourself, and share that honesty with God; after all he already knows, the more peace you will have, and the more equipped you will be to LIVE VICTORIOUSLY. Let today be the day that you allow His blood to wash over you, remember that your sins are forgiven, and you are made new in HIM. 

    Today, a new you starts NOW! Call out Jesus' name. Tell the devil he can go back to where he came from and he no longer has a hold on you. Hell is a real place, and there is no where else the devil would rather you be than walking through hell on earth and keep you from LIVING the life God created for you. There is a battle over you and you have to decide today, and every day which side you are going to allow to win. You can listen to the lies of the devil or you can listen to the truth of God. You may not need the same words of affirmation as me, but I want to encourage you to find the TRUTH that God speaks about you, write it down, and put it somewhere that you will see it daily. Read it and believe it. It will most likely take time for the truth to sink in and for you to truly walk in it, but once you do, there will be a noticeable difference in how you handle life on a daily basis. 

    There is no better day than today to start living for God. There is no better day than today to start living victoriously. There is not a better day than today to call on the name of Jesus and send the devil packing. Let the truth of today sink in, let it knock you to your knees as you think of Jesus being beaten, his flesh torn, spit upon, ridiculed, nails holding him to the cross, soldiers casting lots for his clothes, and his innocence as he hung there waiting for the time to say, "IT IS FINISHED." My heart is heavy as I write this, tears fill my eyes and slide down my cheeks as the reality of today sinks in. I am guilty of stumbling through my morning routine and praying for Friday so I can enjoy the weekend. I don't want to live that way anymore. I want to wake up and LIVE VICTORIOUSLY every day and I can only do that when I live surrendered to the calling God has on my life. 

THE TRUTH...

    Jesus came to this earth to die for our sins so we could live with him in Heaven for all eternity. You don't have to live life feeling defeated; give your brokenness, hurt, and pain to God and watch him turn your ashes to beauty. 

God LOVES you!  God is FOR you! God says you are ENOUGH! God says you are CHOSEN! 

Where have you been?

 

    I've had several people tell me that I need to write again. That they miss reading my blog posts and while I felt encouraged I wasn't ready to write. I wasn't in a place to open up, but today I am willing to do just that. So, where have I been?

    I can sit here and tell you that I've been busy, and I wouldn't be lying. My schedule has been crazy with going back to coaching, my husband being a band director, and my daughter being in multiple extracurricular activities at her school; I've had very little time to do anything else. That is a wonderful excuse, but it's an excuse. If you've read any of my posts before this one, you know that I'll be honest and vulnerable, so here's the truth...

    I withdrew. I shutdown. I closed myself off. I was hurting. I turned away. I went off the path. I walked the wide path. I was tired. I fell. I sunk into a pit. I allowed the darkness to swallow me. I fought. I gave up. I tried to stand. I got knocked back down. I tried again. I got knocked down. I sat. I searched. I tried to get up. I was stuck. I couldn't move forward. 

     Every time the darkness engulfs me it seems harder to find the faintest light of hope, but this time the pull of giving in has been much stronger. It's scary how easy it would be to just give up and allow myself to continue to sink into the oblivion of darkness, to allow myself to self destruct and continue down the road of self-hatred, embarrassment, and shame. Today's date caught my attention, I am just under six months from turning 40. I am not where I thought I would be at this point in my life. I am officially obese and weigh more than I have ever weighed, yes; that's including my pregnancies, and I can't seem to lose it; which infuriates me. I can't look in the mirror without being embarrassed or feel ashamed even though part of my weight gain couldn't be helped. My weight shouldn't be my hang up, but more importantly it's my health. I'm not healthy and it scares me. I don't want to die young like my dad and my brother. I want to be holistically healthy and that includes being acutely aware of my weight. It's all one big circle, and getting my gut health in check, will allow me to become holistically healthy and help get me out of this vicious cycle.

    So, what keeps me going? My family, my husband, and my kids. I can't give up because they need me, but also because I want my kids to see no matter how hard life can be  you have to keep going. Each day is going to be different. Some days you need to be alone. Some days you need to be with your loved ones. Some days you need to get out. Some days you need to be with a friend who will listen to you or make you laugh or give you advice. Some days you just get up and do what has to be done. Eventually the hard days become less hard and you start having more good days than bad. You look up and you're out of the storm, out of the pit, and life is good again. 

    Finally, a little glimpse of hope. God spoke ever so quietly to me. I'm not completely out of the dark, nor am I completely sure how long I will stand on these wobbly legs before getting knocked down again, but there is one thing I know. I am not going to sit in the pit anymore. I WILL NOT GIVE UP! The Devil can try to keep me down, and it may take longer for me to stand, but I will stand up...I WILL RISE! "Do not rejoice over me, my enemy! Though I have fallen, I will stand up; though I sit in darkness, the Lord will be my light." Micah 7:8 

    Still I Rise has been my motto for almost a year now. I am not one to give up easily or quit. It may take me a while to get up, especially, when I keep getting hit with tough situations or changes but I do not and will not wave the white flag of surrender. I have allowed myself to sit and wallow too long, and I'm angry with myself for allowing it. I am not where I want to be mentally, physically, or spiritually, but I have learned a lot about myself during this dark time. Things that I didn't realize before or maybe I knew but didn't want to accept. The truth is, even when I am down and out, God is still working in me and for me. He never walked away from me even though I flat out told Him that I wasn't sure he was for me. When I stopped praying daily; He didn't walk away from me. He waited for me to come back to him. I am back talking to him and as I open up to him, he is showing me that He loves me and is for me.

    There you have it....that's where I've been for over a year. Not writing. Not growing. Not walking faithfully. Just merely surviving. Just sitting. Just letting life happen. I have started writing again. I have started taking steps to better myself again. I will continue to move forward with my life knowing that perfection is not the goal, but progress is what I should focus on. Thankfully, I'm not who I was 10 years ago, and I know that when I look at this point I will see God's hand just as I do now when looking back to who I was 10 years ago. "I lift my eyes to the mountains-where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the maker of Heaven and earth." Psalm 121:1-2

    Where have you been? How is life treating you? I'll write again soon. Here's a parting verse and some encouragement for you today: "I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being." Ephesians 3:16 Remember this: YOU ARE CHOSEN! YOU ARE LOVED! YOU ARE CALLED! YOU ARE EQUIPPED!